(3rd of 4 part series on how to find a career coach. Back to list of questions to ask.)
I recommend not directly asking if they have balls. You can if you like. But your coach needs them. It is the metaphorical balls they need. It should be easy to tell when you are out shopping.
Your coach needs to have ballsy edginess to them. (Yes ladies can have these balls. Shoot I’ve seen more women with balls than men of late. That is another blog post.)
It’s the edginess that communicates I can do what others can not and I’m going to prove it. The edginess is a positive confidence with challenging honesty.
Pansies do not make good coaches. “Well that is pretty good…” is not what you want to hear when paying $125 or more an hour with hard-earned money.
You want to hear, “Improvement is needed here, here and here. This is how we are going to do it. I won’t let you turn into a wuss and back out. We can do this.”
Here is another million dollar hint.
Listen to the order and frequency of the pronouns I/Me, You and We when the coach speaks.
Bad coaches say I a lot, You next and hardly ever say “we”.
Pretty good coaches say You, I and sometimes we.
Excellent obsessed coaches say you, we and sometimes I.
An excellent obsessed career coach identifies with their clients and is compelled to make a difference. That is why “we” is said the most by this type. They believe it IS a team effort.
BTW: Team requires at least two people.
Enough said??
Here is a mistake rookies make.
A cocky attitude does not equate to having the goods. Maverick in the movie Top Gun had a cocky attitude… opps.. Goose is dead.
Epic fail.
I’m proud of Maverick. (As much as one can be of a fictional character). He unlike most people chose to learn from his failure. He did not wallow in his grief forever and become fearful by thinking he would kill somebody else if he started flying again.
Nothing is a failure if you learn the lesson pain has to offer. Maverick turned epic failure into epic win!
Cocky attitude + I can do everything myself = Dead best friend.
Was change into
Confident attitude + I can’t do everything myself = Kill shot on enemy.
Not
Wussy attitude + I can’t do anything right = Never flying again out of fear.
What happened to Maverick at the end of the movie? He became a Top Gun instructor… an excellent obsessed coach with the goods.
Don’t make this mistake either.
Misunderstanding can be easy. Promise me you will not think there is one perfect personality that creates excellent coaches.
There are TONS! of excellent obsessed coaches with a mild manner exterior. Some of the best absolutely abhor being in the spot light. They are creating space for you to shine. Notice how it is creating space, not giving up their space. That is their gift to the world. Take the gift if they offer it.
Only a cocky unconfident attitude says “No thank you. I have to create everything myself.”
Career coaches with balls make guarantees. Thus you should ask…
Question 4: What guarantee do you offer?
